One Large Popcorn Please

Watching someone choose their seats in a movie theater is sort of like watching them figure out a particularly hard riddle. First they stop right at the entrance, blocking any other movie goers. Then a quizzical expression washes over their face, their brows knit together and their heads cock to the side. Some people have a dumbfounded look while others just look plain upset. Myself, I never really give much thought to it. I usually take a seat next to whatever or whoever- as long as it is a good view.
I went to see Harry Potter tonight, of which did not disappoint. It had more of a comedic edge to it than the previous HP movies but I seemed to do more laughing at the audience than at the movie. Every film that you go to has to have the same staple members of the audience.

The Old Couple- Probably forced to see the movie by their spoiled grandkids, they whisper things like "crazy liberals" during the previews and watch the movie with a permanent frown on their faces. Of course, when they leave the theater they are going to love the movie. What else would they tell their grandkids?

The Young Couple- Most likely on their first date. They usually have the loud, genuine conversations about the previews, but then you don't hear a peep from them the rest of the movie. You can sometimes catch them staying behind until the credits are done just to see if there are any bonus scenes.

The Lone Man- An avid reader of the book, and has the most critical eye of the audience. These are the guys that laugh at the quiet, most random times with a jolly, Santa-like chuckle or a deep hyena laugh. They always have a gigantic tub of popcorn that could feed a family of six and sometimes give you the creeps.

The Herds of Pre/Teen Girls- This is probably the third time they've seen the movie because they have to see it with all of their friends. Even so, they still feel the need to talk throughout the whole film and scream the loudest at the surprising parts. They will most likely giggle and rant about how "cute" or "pretty" the actors are; to the annoyance of the other people sitting in close proximity to them. They will also whisper stuff like "so awkward" during the truly awkward parts of the movie, to which deserve a chuckle from the rest of the audience (we're all thinking the same thing).

Everybody Dance!

I envy the boy in the check pants- not only are his pants awesome, but so are his dancing moves and his infallible interest in Paul's guitar. He probably got to touch it.

Pineapple whattt?

Pineapple Cake!


Its easy. Its delicious. Its the best damn pineapple cake you'll ever eat.

Ingredients:
1 box of vanilla cake mix
1 can of pineapple pureed

Directions:
Combine cake mix and pureed pineapple
Mix it
Pour it
Cook accordingly
Eat

I finally got my new camera up and running! Here's the first picture to christen the purchase.

Mango Splash

Sometimes I like to go to Costco and try all the free food samples. Most of the time I give in and end up buying at least one of the them. On my recent escapade, Costco had a David's Cookies stand up. The stand, deceiving as it may be, was actually giving out samples of pies.
All the better. I like pies better than cookies anyway.
Out of the different array of pies they had on display, I choose to try the Mango Splash. Turns out, it was the best mango pie I ever had.

When I Should Be Sleeping

On rare occasions, I find myself watching the 700 Club or other late night paid programing on TV. I never specifically tune into the shows but rather, its just a show I transition into watching and am too lazy to change the channel. Most of the the time I'm usually involved in a painting, a book, or some other sort of work.
About half way through the program, I actually become aware of what I'm watching and immediately feel the need to change the channel. These shows, whether they are talking about religion or feeding the children always give me an awkward feeling, a sort of pity for them (the people on the TV) and a pity for me (because I never do anything about my pity). One day I will work up the audacity to finally change the channel.

Doctor Please

Do doctors make very good patients? I can only imagine the doctor contradicting his own doctor's diagnosis.

"Well Doctor Smith, It seems that you have swimmer's ear. If you take some ear drops for about a week or so, you'll be as healthy as a horse in no time."

"Actually doctor, I believe I have an inner ear infection. I did some tests back in my own office. Prescribed antibiotics seems like the appropriate course of treatment."

In My Dreams

http://www.myspace.com/eels

Not only is the song beautiful, but the video is too. There's something about the colors and the lighting that keeps me mesmerized.

Will They Be Serving Drinks?

During the summer, I volunteer at the library a few nights a week. Recently we have been preparing for a grand Harry Potter extravaganza for the elementary school kids. One of our strenuous duties tonight was calling all of the families that signed up and reminding them of the time, date and such. It was a hard task given that we did not know how to answer any of the parents' questions; we were just reading off a script and had no clue about any of the details of the night. During our break, a few of the other staff got together to share funny stories about how our mission went. The funniest call, hands down, went something like this:

"Hello, I'm calling from the library to remind you that you've signed your child up for the Harry Potter night...When you arrive please bring your form you received after you signed up... "
"Wait! What if we don't have a form?"
"Sir, everyone was given a form."
"Well, what if I lost it."
"Uh, maybe you should find it."
...
"Er, Okay. Oh and will they be serving drinks?"
"Excuse me?"
"You know, like beer."
"Um, I'm sorry but this is a children's program. They will not be serving alcoholic drinks at the library."
"Oh okay. Thanks"
...

Boundaries Are For The Healthy

I was walking out of the mall when an incredibly inexpensive pillow caught my eye. I stopped to look at it. It was one of those sales that though the product itself wasn't the greatest of quality, the price was just too good not to pass up.
While I was busy debating about it, the bathroom door swung open and a sturdy old lady waddled out. She was wearing baggy black clothes and her wrinkles were like deep crevasses on her face. I think they even had their own shadows. While passing she whispered incoherently to me something about being sick.
Wondering what she could be talking about, I looked back to the restroom she came out of; it was the men's room. Confused, I looked around for the women's restroom, which turns out, was only a few feet away. Yep, she was definitely in the men's room. I looked back to the old lady, who was now leaving the store. I decided I didn't really want the pillow.

Revelations

You know you are truly close with someone when you can comfortably say, "Ew, this is disgusting! Try it!"

Shark Attack

Driving my younger brother home from the beach, I overheard his conversation with our mom.

"Hey Mom."
"Hi hun, how was your day?"
"It was good, we went to the beach with Uncle Mitch."
"Did you go to the one near his old house?"
"Yeah. I got attacked by a shark today too."
"Did you?"
"Yeah. I got attacked by a shark named Mitch."

Library Encounter

Yesterday afternoon, I was in the library researching the availability of a few books I wanted to read. A father and his disinterested teenage daughter sat down in the chairs next to me. He typed in a book on the computer and then he left again with his daughter in tow. After they had been gone for a few minutes, I took a peek at the book he had been trying to find (he left the search page up). Turns out it was "How to Win Friends and Influence People".
I wondered if the book was for the man or his daughter.

Oh The Ricey Goodness

I love mochi.

I really love mochi.

Farmer's Market

I was at the local farmer's market this morning buying a blueberry bush. As I was paying for my new bush, a priest walked up behind me with a cane in each hand. He looked like he had just returned from the local Renaissance Festival, wearing old brown tweed robes and an aged gold cross dangling from his neck.
The priest came with no money and no intentions of purchasing anything.
The farmer asked the priest if he planned on returning next Sunday (as they were only open Sundays) and the priest said that he'd try, but he is very busy. He proceeded to tell us his weekly schedule, he works seven days a week and most of the time two shifts a day. I politely excused myself before he went into anymore detail. I had to take my blueberry bush home.

Vocab Lesson #2

Vacation:

a respite or a time of respite from something : intermission
a scheduled period during which activity (as of a court or school) is suspended
a period of exemption from work granted to an employee
a period spent away from home or business in travel or recreation
an act or an instance of vacating

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Key Lime Pie Is Positively Wonderful

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The Thoughts of Coconuts and Rum

One philosophy I have learned to love is that of Jimmy Buffett. You don't have to be a fan of his music or the man himself. It is his way of life I have grown to respect; relax and go with the flow. Ever since his first Cd came out, my father has tried to instill these life lessons in my head. I don't think I have really fully understood them now.

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I Am Leaving

I found myself staring out of the window of an Amtrak train, departing NYC and gazing at a series of rivers and tributaries. Despite the muddy coloring of the water, one could consider the surrounding foliage beautiful. I then looked down at my Ipod and noticed the song, I am Leaving by Blue Roses (Laura Groves) was playing. I started to feel a moment come on, in between the song and the geography around me. The train however approached a run down, vacant building covered with uncreative graffiti. Largest of all were the words "Suck it" scrawled across the building in large, red, chicken-scratch letters. The moment was gone.


http://www.myspace.com/musicofblueroses

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An Account Of A Day's Activities

After walking the streets of New York City, my father and I went to an Italian restaurant for a relaxing lunch. Upon entering the restaurant, I couldn't help but notice an abundance of seniors dining. One particularly stout lady stood out in my mind. It looked like that gravity affected her more than others.
It wasn't enough that the room was packed with old folk, but it seemed that they were grouped in a herd, all dining on either Chicken Parmesan or Raviolis. The food was good but the waiters' lack of attention was annoying. I think it was because one of their older costumers might have caused a riot if they weren't served on demand. Maybe I'm just another naive youth. You know we all suffer from the same disease, naivete.
Just as they dined in a herd, they left in one. My father, the man I get my sense of humor from, leaned into my ear and whispered, "Its the old people on parade. They don't move very fast but they sure are colorful." I tried to choke back a laugh but failed. It was too true.
Soon after, we left the restaurant humming Pink Elephants On Parade (think dumbo). I very much enjoyed that lunch.

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